I had a victory with my healing this afternoon! I had called the doctor and told her about my lingering ear infection symptoms. She said she would call in a prescription for me for levaquin, a stronger antibiotic. I was doubtful as to whether this antibiotic would be as cheap as the amoxicillin I had been taking, but nevertheless, i went to the drug store, and sure enough, it was $30+. So I politely told the clerk I would come back the next day.

In the afternoon, I decided to listen to Dan Downey’s testimony about how he got rid of his infection, and decided to fight mine like he did, no matter how long or hard I have to swing God’s hammer (the Word) at it. I started to feel better, then I started doing a search on the internet for healing testimonies, and found several, plus a very good web site 101 New Covenant Road, which had a great healing testimony, as well as great articles on how to listen to God, etc. I found myself actually reading the scriptures in the articles, something which I unfortunately tend to skip over whenever I am reading Christian articles. I loved all the articles on grace, healing, hearing God’s voice, and somehow all of these built my faith. I also listened to the healing confession audio file again, and found myself semi-silently repeating some of it!

I could tell that my faith and belief were working, because by late afternoon, the pain had gone. There was still an uncomfortable feeling of fullness in the right ear, which I asked God to help me with. At one point, when I had to tip my head sideways, some more of the ear drops I had put in during the morning came out. That relieved a great deal of the pressure. By the time I  got home, I felt and believed that I was healed. There was no question or doubt, I thought to myself, “I am healed,” in a matter-of-fact, yet optimistic way. Tonight I told my husband about all this, and he agreed with me that I was healed and that I would not need that levaquin.

At some point I remember a thought of worry going through my head: “but what if it comes back tomorrow? What if it doesn’t hold?” Like lightening, I rebuked myself. “What are you saying, that the Word of God isn’t strong enough to last more than a day?” ‘No, the Word of God endures forever.” If God says I am healed, then I am healed! No ifs, ands or buts about it. And if the symptoms try to come back, then I will drive them out with God’s Word once again.

I also read a healing testimony where the author said God told him that either he was sick or he wasn’t. One was the truth, the other was a lie. Which one did he choose? When he told God he was healed, God told him, “then act like it”, so he got up and vacuumed. I thought of how I could also do the same, so tonight I laundered the sheets, took down three bags of garbage, cleaned my new purse (yes, my new $7 purse God had me find through Ebay), cooked dinner, washed dishes, and did a bunch of stuff without complaint. Why? Because normally I feel a lack of energy and motivation to do all that. But I reasoned that if I were a totally healed, healthy woman, who was not lazy, what would I be doing? I would be up and about, serving God and my family, and others, that’s what.

I must preface all this by saying that I and my family had quite a spiritual battle in the past week before all this happened. In fact, I woke up in the middle of the night last night with my husband hugging and kissing me, and when I asked him what happened, he said he had a horrible dream that I died, and that he was trying to find our son another mom. I myself had had some anxieties along those lines last week, and a mild cloud of depression/oppression seemed to hand over me, where I felt a certain hopelessness about getting over the ear infection, etc. I knew it wasn’t right, and I was surprised by the intensity of it, even though it was not as strong as what I experienced before. Now I think perhaps it was part of premenstrual syndrome. But nevertheless, I knew in my heart that it was a spiritual battle.

It was no surprise, then, that whenever I immersed myself in the Word, I would always feel better, but when I did not focus on the Word as much, the enemy had more opportunity to try to harass me, discourage me, etc. I told this to my husband who agreed, saying, “I also need to immerse myself in the Word, too.” In fact, he has pledged that tomorrow will be a day of no TV or internet, where he will teach our son ABCs, numbers, etc. Good for him!

I have decided that I will not cancel our cable service until he decides that he really, really wants it done. He had talked about it over the weekend, with me reminding him that it was a prudent way to slash our financial expenses, but it was spoken of as a “sacrifice”. Sure it is, but I would rather that he be wholeheartedly willing to give up TV before I shut the service off, otherwise, he might later blame me for taking away our enjoyment. I think it’s a wise plan of action.

Also wanted to mention that I also had a weird dream last night, where I was asking everyone, including my parents, whether I should go to this retreat in Idaho. My mom gives me her tight-lipped smile. Jump forward and I am in Idaho, except it looks like downtown L.A. instead, and almost everyone there is single. I even see single people from my job there! Anyway, I tell my family I am going to turn tail and fly back home, even though I don’t know how, since it’s night by now. But I get a call from a woman who asks me if I remember her. She tells me she is flying home and I excitedly try to tell her that I will be going with her on the same flight, but her cell phone is breaking up and trying to communicate with her is maddening! Somehow afterwards my friend from work and I look outside and see a jet hovering very close to a tall office building. There are droves of partying young people that suddenly appear in the windows. But the jet stops, then transforms itself into a robot and starts climbing the building, demanding to find someone. The crowd of young people start screaming and running pell mell everywhere.

I told my husband this part of the dream and he laughed. But all I can say is that I was left with a warm feeling, that I would never be alone, that God would always provide a companion to be with me, no matter what leg of the journey I am on.

Praise be to God, who has give us his Son, his Word, so that we have everything we need at all times!